On Refusing Anesthetic
For three hours,
the scalpel does its cutting:
I lie unflinching,
practice meditation,
follow my breath,
slow in, slow out.
The hardest part,
I tell the doctor,
is the waiting room,
incessant TV barking
I’m not used to,
tidbits of the latest murder
blaring from the screen,
a thoughtless Tweet
repeated from our president-elect—
senseless acts for which
I would accept
any numbing possible.
the scalpel does its cutting:
I lie unflinching,
practice meditation,
follow my breath,
slow in, slow out.
The hardest part,
I tell the doctor,
is the waiting room,
incessant TV barking
I’m not used to,
tidbits of the latest murder
blaring from the screen,
a thoughtless Tweet
repeated from our president-elect—
senseless acts for which
I would accept
any numbing possible.
*******
The All
My sister, scarred from self-inflicted
razor wire;
my dad cramped beneath an army tent,
playing chess with toothbrush handles;
my second husband surviving, famished
on a rusty cot in Russia;
while the rest of his family perishes
in Dachau’s ovens;
my teacher Roshi on the curb, cupping a begging bowl,
as we practice homelessness;
sunlight sharpening the electric razored fence,
when I chaplain men in Concord prison;
the sharp-boned elderly, who creep
arm in arm along the street;
and in the distance, a lone majestic peak
awaiting snow.